I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
