Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
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