i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Randomize