I look better un-naked...
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
We talked him into tasing himself.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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