You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I just hit your bf in the face with a mustard bottle and the guy at the table next to us bowed down to me.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
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