dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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