ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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