come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
Randomize
