So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's rum buckets o'clock
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
