dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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