I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
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