Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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