the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
He uses pillows to masturbate.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize