Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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