this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
