She went from zero to smokin in five shots
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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