We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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