i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
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if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
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He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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