I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Randomize
