It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
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