You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
