i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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