yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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