I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize