I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
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