needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Randomize
