My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I wear drunk well.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
