windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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