Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
he wants to bone in the snuggie
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
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