I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize