It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
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