So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Before we have sex for the first time I would like "eye of the tiger" to be playing to mentally prepare me for what I'm about to endure.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
