There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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