i think my mom watched the whole time
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
So gin and wine won't be happening again
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Randomize
