finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
