the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
