you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
Randomize
