I accidentally had phone sex last night
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
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