Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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