she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
