i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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