His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Even my Mr Clean Magic Eraser can't make last night disappear.
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
Randomize
