i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
BRING THE BAGELS
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
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