i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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