I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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