i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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