Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
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corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
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She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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