can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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