soooo we both peed the bed last night...
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
