SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
